May flowers... hmmm....
I guess soon they'll come. Right now I don't see them. Its been a tough couple of weeks. I feel that every deep relationship/friendship that I've built has been torn away from me. My comfort, my peace is that the my relationship with the Lord cannot be torn away, no matter where I'm at, He is near. He knows my every thought, my sorrows, my desires. He understands me and in my stubborness He is patient to teach me and discipline me in love. Today is Mexican Mother's day. I bought some flowers for my sis here, I miss my family.
Music. It has the power to make you sad, happy, thoughtful, tired, frustrated, scared. Usually you can't think clearly while music is playing, if it has lyrics. Silent button. Shhhhhhh..... what peace. In this crazy city its constantly noisy and loud. I need rest. But the quietness reminds me that I'm alone. Being alone is not something that is easy for me. I guess if I walked with the assurance that I would be alone only for a little while longer, I'd enjoy the quietness more.
We want what we don't have rather than indulging in all that we do have.
I can't believe there are only about 5 months left until I say goodbye. I think I might come back. But this depends on alot of things. I can't see myself like this for 2 more years. I'm waiting on the Lord to make some things clear. He's showed me that one of those options of mine is not that great. But I'm asking that he would do a work, and I know He is able. So I wait, and we'll see.
I pray that eyes of the heart will be enlightened to see Dad's marvelous plans and will.
I need something new, and refreshing. I feel like its been struggle after struggle, yalla, Dad, you said after a little while.....
Jaz, I can hear your heart in the posts that you post here, you have such a deepness about you that is so cool! It is such an awesome thing to see/hear! I'm praying with you and for you and I know that Dad will give you the desires of your heart! He loves you and so do I!!
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